Student Teaching

The moment has finally come. Tomorrow morning at 8 am I will officially be a student teacher. This freaks me out, and if it is weird for you, it is probably ten times weirder for me.

It’s not weird because I don’t feel ready or prepared, because I am ready. It’s just that since I was three years old I have imagined myself doing what I am about to embark on tomorrow. When I was that small I actually played teacher in our playroom in the basement. My mom gave me her old teacher books and lesson plan books and my dad bought me a large marker board with dry erase markers and then my imagination went wild. Let me tell you too, I was the best dang teacher that playroom has ever seen (my sister may disagree).

And now, I am no longer wearing my mom’s high heels that my feet didn’t fit into or putting on blue eye shadow to make myself look more grown up and teacher like. Instead, I have shoes that fit, my own planning book, and I don’t wear the blue eye shadow (thank goodness!).
Beginning tomorrow morning what I have been preparing for basically my whole life is going to be tested and graded. The next fifteen weeks are the final moments of putting everything I have learned and observed into final practice, proving that I do indeed deserve that Indiana Teaching License.

Tonight feels strange because this is the first time that I am not writing down my class schedule or making sure I have the right books for school the next day. Those days have passed. Tomorrow is the real deal; a whole new adventure in the fifth grade.

So, sitting here tonight going to bed much earlier than I would be if I just had classes to attend, I have become more acutely aware of how in just a blink of an eye life goes by. It seems like only yesterday I was playing dress up and scribbling on a white board teaching a bunch of dolls how to spell ‘cat.’ And soon, student teaching will be over too, and then I will just be a Huntington University Alumni. But, I think for now I need to take this one day at a time.

Roanoke Elementary…I am yours.

Happy Wednesday!

It is Wednesday. Middle of the week. Many people call today ‘Hump Day.’ I don’t really understand why. I guess they say it is because you made it over the hump and the rest of the week is downhill from here? That to me is just stupid though. And ‘hump day?’ Really? But, today has started off wonderfully, so maybe I should not be so critical.

The reason today has been great so far is because yesterday, it was 40 degrees out so all of the snow began to melt. Then, in the middle of the night, it got down to the teens. So what happened? That's right; everything froze, and I am talking everything. This also means that all schools, businesses, and highways from here to Indy are closed, including my work. It was a shocking surprise because today is also Chelsey and Christen's birthday, and some of us girls in our apartments were going to give them a little breakfast birthday celebration at 8:45 so I could still make it to work. So, instead of eating and then running to work, we were all able to eat, watch Regis and Kelly and read a little Cosmo. Not such a bad Wednesday morning. I love my friends, that is for sure!

Anyway, in celebration of the fact that the week is halfway over and the fact that I am in shorts and a really comfortable shirt instead of all dressed up, I would like to share with you a little story that always puts a smile on my face.

I know I have written before about how during Fourth of July weekend my family and I put on a Talent Show. It is intense. I would not say we are that talented of a family in regards to singing or being able to play an instrument, so this means that we get creative, and it is hilarious. We perform outside of the cottage right before the fireworks on the lake. Even the family dogs come out to watch. And that is where my story begins.

Many of you know about Scotty, the snotty West Highland Terrier that belongs to our family. He is precious sometimes, but he knows he is good looking and he struts his stuff with his tail high in the air. One of my favorite things about Scotty is his loyalty. He is not the kind of dog that loves everyone and will lick just anyone's face. No, no, no. That type of attention is only given to the select 12 of us in our extended family. Any other stranger who wants to pet him he has to force himself to be nice. When people come up to him and reach out their hands, he barely stretches his head to them basically saying, "Alright, I guess you can pet me, but make it quick."

Well, during this particular Talent Show, Scotty was misbehaving. We ended up putting him back inside of the cottage so he would not disturb the show (did I mention we were intense with this Talent Show?). In between acts, I went inside quick to get some coffee. When i walked in, the first thing I saw was the leftovers from my mom's lasagna dinner lying all over the floor. Someone had dug into the trash, took out the paper plates, and began to eat whatever was left on them. Had to be Scotty.

Then, I went behind the opened trash, and saw the little culprit. There he was, eating and licking the pan that my mom had made the lasagna in, just loving life. I yelled, "Scotty!!" And with that, Scotty's white little furry body jumped. He had no idea I was there. He looked up at me, and knew he did wrong.

And instead of running away or ignoring me like most dogs, Scotty sat down right next to the pan he licked up, his fur around his face red from the lasagna, and just sat there looking at me. He just stared, waiting for me to tell him that it was okay, and he was still the best and snottiest little dog around. In fact, he stayed in that position long enough for me to get this classic picture with Scotty and the completely empty pan of lasagna.

With that, Happy Wednesday!

Blank Page

Disclaimer: Yesterday when I was checking my blog stats, I clicked something that deleted about three of my posts, including my last one. Needless to say, I was super annoyed and I can’t find where the posts went. Oops. And, I wrote this post yesterday, thought I posted it, but it did not work. Try number 2…here we go.

Let me share a little something with you. I am having the hardest time writing today! I am trying to write three different articles for a magazine. Two of the ideas were my own, so you would think I would be able to sit down to the computer and just pounce on the ideas. Wrong. For some reason, when I know that my article will be read by a real live editor (who could potentially tear it apart), for a real magazine publication, that will be read by thousands and thousands of people who actually have to pay to read the article I wrote, my mind sort of freezes. I hate that. Really, what I am doing with these articles are no different than what I have been doing before, it’s just in my mind I can see a clear picture of my editor reading my first drafts. Are they going to be tossed in the trash? Red ink all over my words? Crap.

This is not positive thinking or a good mental environment for the words to flow out naturally and create something that people should actually want to read. I have no reason to have writer’s block (except for the fact that everyone gets it). In fact, as I was checking my blog stats this morning it showed that my viewership has reached an all-time amazing level, and I now have readers in Russia, Australia, England, and South Africa. So, thank you! That being said, my mind should not blank out when I have to write something that I will be getting paid for, I need to just write like I am writing for this blog…like I used to write when I thought no one was reading, hah.

That is why I turned back to my blog, home sweet home. I was literally staring at a blank word document page for twenty minutes trying to get my fingers typing and nothing was happening. I mean nothing. Every time I tried to start something off, my mind would wander to the fact that my legs are aching with pain because of my workout last night or how I could really use a strong cup of coffee. Those thoughts led to my plans for the night and what I should wear, which then led to how much I really wanted to buy these flats at Banana Republic. This is not good. The cycle would just continue leading nowhere. I definitely needed to just write on, well, whatever. That is what I am doing now. And I needed some support from other people who know what I am talking about. That is when I stumbled upon this quote that describes exactly how I feel in this moment:

“Writing is easy: all you do is sit staring at a blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead.” –Gene Fowler (journalist; take those communication courses at Huntington and you will know all about this guy, too)

So, sometimes it is true, that the words don’t come as easily as you would like them too. But, through this process I think I am learning a lot. A whole new adventure which I am sure will lead to some pretty awesome things. Stay tuned!

(The above photo was found here.)

Here I Go Again!

Fact: I have been working on cover letters and resumes for the past 8 hours. Okay, slight lie, I did take a little time off to go shopping at Charming Charlie’s. Anyway, for those of you who have not had to apply for jobs in a while or are still in school and don’t need to just yet, let me tell you, it is not a fast process. But, if you want to know something else, I kind of enjoy it.

Since it is J-Term here at school, I have had two days of Erica time. Actually, this translates to “there is no one on campus, all of my roommates are still gone, and there is nothing to do.” When Jessie and I pulled into campus Sunday night, it was half empty. Most students are on academic trips or doing internships. Since I had Monday and Tuesday basically all alone, I thought it would be a good time to start applying for full time positions. I already had some ideas and leads, so Monday (after waking up at noon; who am I?), I put together a binder organized very specifically according to city/region according to major (elementary education or communication studies). Haha, I can’t help it that I am a communication studies major, okay?

Today, I realized that there was nothing left to organize and that I have procrastinated enough. I woke up early, and after a couple of attempts of trying to get stuff done while in my workout shorts and sweatshirt, I kept trying to watch a movie or stalk someone else on Facebook. It was time to get serious. I took a shower, got ready, and put on jeans and a nice sweater to make myself feel more professional and deserving of these jobs that I was about to apply for. And then it was like I hit a home run; things were getting done. Thank goodness when Christen finally came back to the apartment today. It seemed as if I had had little human interaction the past 48 hours and was going certifiably insane.

Tonight, when I got up to get a drink of my cranapple juice (and, after drinking a glass full of it and wondering why it tasted like cardboard and barbecue sauce mixed together and then realizing that I was drinking Christen’s nasty ‘light cranberry juice’ instead of my delicious fattening crap) it hit me that tomorrow morning I no longer will be cooped up in my apartment! Tomorrow I start a new internship. And suddenly, I felt pretty confident in my resume sending techniques.

Tomorrow, I begin my January Term internship at Floyd and Partners in Fort Wayne (http://www.floydandpartners.com/). It is a public relations and advertising agency and I am super pumped to be able to gain a new experience. It is sort of funny how it came about because I called them asked if they by chance would get an intern for the month of January and unbeknown to me, they had been looking for one until May! They asked for my resume and cover letter, I sent them to them that day, they called me back that day, scheduled an interview for the next day, went in, and got the call three days later that I would be interning with them! This goes to show that if you can take some initiative, you never know where you will end up.

And I am sure glad I did, because beginning tomorrow I will be on board for a whole new adventure. I like to think of new experiences as adventures because you never know what will happen or where they will lead. There is something exciting about diving into the unknown and being a little unsure and having to give something all you got. Whenever I come to the point where a new adventure is around the corner, I always like to listen to the song “Here I Go Again” by Whitesnake. I first heard the song my freshman year of college on a packed, smelly and rusted old bus in Mexico. In between all of these Spanish songs, came this one, and sure enough all of the Americans on the bus were singing along. I will always remember listening to it as we drove through the Mexican terrain and headed to the ocean. Mexico then was another adventure to me, and hearing the lyrics from the song are inspiring. The song makes you feel like, “Yeah, I can do this!” and that is what is so great about it. You hear it and even though you may not know exactly where the adventure will take you, you are independent and headed in a new direction carrying your past experiences with you and looking for some new ones.

So, folks, here I go again!

[P.S. If you wonder why I chose that picture of me from three years ago, I did so because I think it describes the feeling of being free and on a whole new adventure!]

Auld Lang Syne

The year 2011 came in with less bells and whistles than 2010, which is ironic because 2011 is going to be one of the biggest years of my life so far. 2011 sort of just slipped on in at midnight giving no signs of the changes and possible greatness the year will hold.

This year, my life is going to move on from one era and into a whole new one. Change is the word to describe 2011, and I will definitely be writing about that ‘c’ word this week. But as 2011 came in Saturday morning at midnight, so did the thoughts of all that is going to happen this year. First of all, I start my student teaching on January 24. I have been waiting to student teach since I was three years old, and now it is actually here. Then, in 2011, I will graduate college. In May, I will graduate from the same school that my parents graduated from, from the college where my grandpa and aunt are on the Board of Trustees, from the college that has been a part of my life since I can remember. In May, I will pack up and move out of Huntington for good, saying goodbye to some of my closest friends. After that, I will get my first real full time job. My job that will lead to a career. I am going to have to get my own insurance, get a new car, and start supporting myself. And, this is the first time in my entire life where I have no idea where I could end up next. When 2011 came, it was the first time where I could not guess where I just may be on New Year’s Eve next year.

2011 is going to be one heck of a big year. I am excited for all that it has to hold. I am excited because 2011 is the gateway to a new era. I think Shauna Niequist in her book, Bittersweet, (see, I told you I liked that book) describes the season of being in your twenties best, and all of the reasons why I am excited for this new time of my life. I will share a few of my favorite excerpts from her chapter on being “Twenty Five”:

“When you’re twenty-five-ish, you’re old enough to know what kind of music you love, regardless of what your last boyfriend or roommate always used to play. You know how to walk in heels, how to tie a necktie, how to give a good toast at a wedding, and how to make something for dinner. You don’t have to think much about skin care, home ownership, or your retirement plan.”

“Now is also the time to get serious about relationships. And ‘serious’ might mean walking away from the ones that don’t give you everything you need. Some of the most life-shaping decisions you make in this season will be about walking away from good-enough, in search of can’t-live-without. One of the only truly devastating mistakes you can make in this season is staying with the wrong person even though you know he is the wrong person. It’s not fair to that person, and it’s not fair to you.”

“Twenty-five is the perfect time to get involved in a church that you love, no matter how different it is from the one you were a part of growing up. Set your alarm on Sunday mornings, no matter how late you were out on Saturday night. It will be dreadful at first, and then after a few weeks, you’ll find that you like it, that the pattern of it fills up something inside you.”

“Don’t get stuck. Move, travel, take a class, take a risk. Walk away, try something new. There is a season for wildness and a season for settledness, and this is neither. This season is about becoming. Don’t lose yourself at happy hour, but don’t lose yourself on the corporate ladder either.”

“These years will pass much more quickly than you think they will. You will go to lots of weddings, and my advice, of course is to dance your pants off at every single one. I hope you go to very few funerals. You’ll watch TV and run on the treadmill and go on dates, some of them great and some of them terrible.”

“Now is your time. Become, believe, try. Walk closely with people you love, and with other people who believe that God is very good and life is a grand adventure. Don’t spend time with people who make you feel like less than you are. Don’t get stuck in the past, and don’t try to fast-forward yourself into a future you haven’t yet earned. Give today all the love and intensity and courage you can, and keep traveling honestly along life’s path.”

And, my favorite:

“You are young enough to believe that anything is possible, and you are old enough to make that belief a reality.”

2011 is the year where I am no longer dependent and where I will really start becoming in the world outside of being a student. And as 2011 announced its presence quietly at midnight, I for probably the 21st time in my life heard that famous New Year’s Eve song, “Auld Lang Syne.” I (naturally) looked up the lyrics and the meaning and was touched.

“Auld Lang Syne” translates to “old long since.” The song is all about remembering times past. Fitting for a new year’s song. I love this song because the first words ask the question, “Should old acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should old acquaintance be forgot, and auld lang syne?” For the days gone by, we should not forget those that were a part of our past year or years. Should we forget those people who have helped shape what our new year will be? Should we forget old times gone by? No. But for auld lang syne we should remember and celebrate the past that has brought us to the present which will lead to the future.

And on New Year’s Eve I did remember those a part of the days leading to the new year and was reminded of all of the good times. Auld Lang Syne reminds me to keep those special to me close and for the sake of days gone by, love the people who painted your past- in whatever color.

So here is to 2011 and all of the unknown adventure that lies ahead. I am ready.