To the Sea

Currently I am the only one up in a house filled with people (okay, seven people), sitting in the beautiful living room. I can hear and smell the ocean, and even feel the cool breeze coming off of it; I just can’t see it because of the dark. This phenomenon makes waking up extremely exciting. When you go to bed you know the sea is feet away, you just can’t see it. Then, when you stand from your bed and look out the window, there it is. Below is a picture from the window of the master bedroom from my bed. Not bad, huh?

We arrived back on the island Christmas night. The most thrilling part was when we were crossing the bridge and being able to see the roads and homes that I remember from last time. The roads and homes that lead to this enchanting place. I felt as if I hadn’t left. Even though this is only my third time here, the place already feels like a safe haven, much like the cottage. Already there are memories stored here, secrets, and dreams that I unknowingly left within the walkways and walls.

I didn’t realize this until I walked in the doors. Well, actually, got off the elevator. My aunt had an elevator put in to make carrying luggage/groceries in easier. Needless to say, it is probably the best addition to the place yet, hah. I rode the elevator up to the third floor with my mom and our luggage. It is a strange feeling riding a private elevator in your aunt’s house, especially when it opens right in the hallway leading to your bedroom. But, as soon as I stepped out the smell of the place filled my nose and the feelings came back.

In case you didn’t know, the ocean has a smell. I think it is the most fantastic smell ever; salty and breezy and fresh. And, since this place is right on the ocean, it smells like the ocean. I had forgotten this smell, and so when I stepped off the elevator I remembered the last times I was here.

In the spring, my life was much different than it is now. The circumstances on my mind then, or what I was worried about in March while I was here the first time have worked their way out. The exciting opportunities we all discussed in April have passed and new ones have come along. Relationships have ended since then, and new friends have been added into the mix. All within 9 months. Funny how quickly life moves, isn’t it? And now here I am back and wondering how everything changed so quickly and wondering if really anything is ever constant. Then I hear the sea and know that it isn’t about having a life filled with no change, but rather learning how to roll with the change.

Coming to the ocean is healing on so many levels. The mystery and depth is indescribable. Our first day here it was wild and dangerous. The waves were thrashing and beating against the sand and you could see whitecaps for miles and miles. The sea tossed huge shells up to shore showing the power that the water has.

Then today the water returned to its turquoise green color and it seemed more peaceful and tranquil. I love the ocean because there are so many stories that it can tell. The sea isn’t steady. Rather it is in constant change; the tide comes and goes, waves come and go, one day it is wild and death seeking and the next it is at peace. The ocean doesn’t have all good days filled with calm waters. Many of its days are like that, but not all. Once in a while a storm does come and the waves toss the life living under it dangerously, sometimes washing them to shore. I love that. I love it because that is how life is.

Our lives are not filled with constant pleasure and tranquil waters every single day. I believe that life is great, but the storms do come and create those whitecaps and change the turquoise to a dark grey. But, just like the sea, there is beauty in the colliding waves and the dangerous current; you may just have to look harder to see it. And, just like the sea, eventually the storm does pass and the turquoise green calm comes back. But, one does not come without the other at some point. And, like the ocean, life would be awfully dull if all we knew were calm seas and never could come to know the joy of learning how to walk with the rushing current of the stormy waters.

And that is why I am thankful to be back. I am thankful to hear the roar of the ocean now, knowing that in the morning the turquoise calm will be there awaiting my bare feet again.
One of my favorite songs from when I was little is the song “Calypso.” My aunt made me listen to it one time in her kitchen when I was little and described the song to me. Basically it is about this ship named Calypso who brought men through the stormy seas and told a story. I always think of that song when I am sailing. One of my favorite lines in the song says, “to be true as the tide, free as a wind swell, joyful and loving in letting it be.”

I love this line because the tide is true. It comes when it should, and leaves when it should; it is reliable. Wind swells are free; they come and go as they please mixing things up. The ocean has both, and like the tide and wind swells we too need to be joyful and loving in letting whatever comes our way be. The sea does not question, it simply does.

So, here is to the cleansing sea, one of God’s most incredible creations. May it always bring wonder, hope, mystery, fear, and charm.

"When anxious, uneasy and bad thoughts come, I go to the sea, and the sea drowns them out with its great wide sounds, cleanses me with its noise, and imposes a rhythm upon everything in me that is bewildered and confused."- Rainer Maria Rilke